Yes, i loved the books to bits. Idk who this director is, if i wanted to be intelligent and wiki it then i would have, but its 02:30 ish in the morning and i cant sleep. Well, i actually laughed/cried the whole way through the film. It was depressing to see one of my favourite books of all time made into such a shitty film. I was desperately hoping for them to pull it together by the end, but by then i was actually throwing popcorn at the cinema screen. It was all i could do to actually stop myself from phsically getting up and booing. Even though i’d read the books about five zillion gatrillion billion times, i didn’t know what was coming next, seens as the director stuck to the plotline about as much as my teachers stick to the homework timetable.

I cant believe they told us the plotline with Arya, too. That was a major shock to me when i read Eldest. Why reveal it? Its frankly stupid – it didn’t even improve the movie. The fact too, that Arya was floaty and vulnerable almost made me wet myself. Because im the sad kind of fantasy nerd that finds things like that funny. But, in the books – i would like to point out – that i think CP has some kind of warped leather Fetish. What kind of teenager puts a woman in full-leather? I mean to be honest, its some guys fantasies, but for god sake, its not exactly practical or remotely fashionable. I mean, how many elves do you know that wonder about in leather, fgs.

Oh~ and dont get me started on Saphira. What was she about? I was like going to take my wrath out on someone sitting next to me – which happened to be a dreadlocked guy, that is a family friend and is pretty hench. I mean come on, her wings didnt even go with her body – and she’s meant to be blue for christ sake. What was that, some nasty shade of purple. If i ever meet the director, im going to physically hurt him.

Jeremy Irons – how could you steep so low? Your awesome. To be honest, he was the best part of the film. His portrayal of Brom was good. Except he was meant to be a frail old man and didn’t die that way. But yes, he did a good job of it, except for the fact he revealed he was a rider so early on – not that it was voluntary or anything.

EW, and now Eragon. I saved him until last because Ed Speelers is such a crappy actor. He was in Echo beach earlier on in the year, too. The fact that he’s a very hot guy, means that he probably got the part by default anyway because the rest of the auditionee’s were sad fantasy nerds. It makes you wonder how poor the quality of acting at the auditions was, doesn’t it? Some of the ways he said some of the more “epic” commands were, quite frankly, worthy of Power rangers – and power rangers only. I wonder how long his acting career will last? If i ever meet him, im going to hit on him first, and if he doesn’t adhere im just going to punch him one for making a mockery of an epic character, such as Eragon.

Poor CP, i wonder how many people its put off reading Eragon. I’ve read some stuff he’s said about it. I dont think he’s allowed to say how disappointed he is, but quite frankly, the film was shit. If i was him i would give the director a right bollocking.